« 60% Overweight (aka AAFES sucks) | Main | Sad »
April 29, 2005
Turn that shit DOWN!!
It wasn't until today that I noticed how often I find myself saying "Turn it down, please" in my house. The eMac, my daughter or son's TV... Were it not for Kev being gone- I would be saying it to him too. I do not know when it was I became so sensitive to noise and what I deem as "ya-ya", but it drives me nucking futs. Its not just TV noise- but the kids raising hell in the back of the house, a neighbor's dog barking, the construction crews.... and the mother of all noise piss-offs: The prick who feels the need to compensate for the size of his penis with his car stereo system.
The ones who not only drive with that thumping irritating shit down the road- I realllllllly hate the ones who go out on Saturday or Sunday morning with a bottle of Armor-all, a rag and their keys. They will sit in front of the building playing that blustering offal- usually right under my bedroom window. Of course he has all four doors wide open, as he details that piece of shit car. It's days like this I wish I kept a box of rocks under the bed-really big rocks.
Of course, I would say something. If I honestly believed he might hear me through the racket, I would holler down. We can all imagine the complete waste of inspired and beautifully strung together profanity he would miss. I like to conserve my execration for those who are not only worthy, but paying full attention.
Keep in mind- I live on the fourth floor of my building, and Germans don't believe in elevators. Were I to actually limp my busted ass ankle down the stairs- all the way down there- I don't think the guy would have much left of his body in tact, other than they ugly ass legs currently hanging out of the car door below me.
Hey! I might even detail my car to show off too- the testicles I tore off to use as fuzzy dice on my mirror.
Posted by TheFreud at April 29, 2005 10:30 AM
