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February 13, 2006
Stank Frau
There is one profound thing that I have experienced here in Germany that I never thought I would.
On two different and distinct occasions I have been practically knocked out by the body odor of another human being.
When we first moved into our home here, the moving company sent 3 people- two men and one woman. Can I just say, GOD DAMN, what a stench. I can understand men who move for a living might not be the cleanest bunch- sweaty and stained- but to smell like that and go into another person's home, touch their things... EW. The Woman is what caught me the most off guard. She was probably in her fifties- a heavy set woman with skin like wet leather. She wore a stained tank top- that's right... it was sleeveless. As if the look of her pit hair as she hefted boxes out of the truck wasn't enough, she wore no bra with this t-shirt weight garment. Her very generous and pendulous titties were sagging somewhere close to her navel. Fucking EW! Sad thing was, she smelled as bad, if not worse, than the men.
The smell of these people proliferated my entire home- for DAYS. We are not talking that weird chicken soup smell you get from your deodorant wearing off at the end of a long day- we are talking full blown, make your stomach churn, foul funk- and it was before breakfast.
Today I made a long overdue call to housing maintenance regarding the lady who cleans our stairwell twice a week. Today she was at the top floor when I came in- so the first floor landing smelled fresh- like pine-sol. The closer I got to the top floors- that funky smell crept in, in started slapping me in the face. Ever tried to climb 4 flights of stairs while holding your breath? It sucks.
That stairwell will have clean floors, yet smell like she hosed it with pit juice for the next 4 hours. So I have made the call I have been meaning to make for months. I can understand that I am in another country, and maybe their ways are different than mine- but for fuck's sake- you work in my building- the doorway to my home. Go get a pit stick, you nasty stank she-beast.
Posted by TheFreud at February 13, 2006 9:53 AM
Comments
LOL. There's no excuse for that is there? It always freaked me out that French women have a regular forest growing out of their armpits. Very natural..yeah, right!
Posted by: TC at February 13, 2006 2:37 PM
We had the same problem with out cleaning lady in our office. She would come in and "clean" and then we would (regardless of the weather) have to open all of the windows to air the building out. We called the facilities office and she was actually taken out of our building, they sent a new female that wore typical European styles, the thong above the pants, pants so tight she couldnt bend and all, and she didnt even clean (couldnt bend over in her pants for fear of giving a real show), so even though I have felt your pain, the stench of our first was at least productive, even though we all had to hold our urine output for at least an hour after she left and then our asses would freeze to the toilet seat, it was better than what we gained. Heidi
Posted by: heidi at February 15, 2006 8:36 AM
I know what you mean. I gave an aquaintance
a ride in my pretty dodge status,that was a mistake. It was funk i had never experienced
before. I dropped his stinking ass off and realized my mistake...from now on i'm going to take a sniff before you get in my ride.
Stop by for a visit
Posted by: michele at February 15, 2006 10:41 PM
I've never had that problem with humans, but I did with dogs though.
Be thankful that you didn't have to use a gas mask in order to survive. ;)
Posted by: Darnell at February 16, 2006 6:11 AM
OH MY GOD....LMAO!! I remember when you told me about Kevin getting stuck between those two rank smelling dirty asses, when your furniture arrived..I haven't laughed that hard or peed my pants since..POOR KEVIN..
I would gladly rather smell a dirty dog's ass than smell a nasty smelling human being who lives in a culture where hair growing everywhere and having its own smell is a great turn on..EeEWWWWW!! Think the sick bastard who has his ole lady shaving every 3rd day would get his way with some of the German women??
Posted by: Mom at March 3, 2006 12:52 AM
